In Mourning

Today I am in mourning. Our president elect, Donald Trump, has been sworn into office.

I mourn as a woman. Our country now has a president who bragged about being able to get away with sexually assaulting women because he’s a celebrity and judges women based on how good her body looks, but doesn’t believe she should have rights over that body. What it means for my fight for reproductive rights, I’m not certain at the moment.

I mourn as a bisexual woman with friends who are also part of the LGBT community. No, Trump holding an upside-down rainbow flag after the election isn’t enough convince me he’s for LGBT as he’s put staunch conservatives who aggressively opposed LGBT rights in his cabinet and made Mike Pence, a man who once removed funds for HIV treatment and put it into conversion therapy , as his vice president.

I mourn as a person who was once ashamed to be diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome because a few of my peers called my younger brother “stupid” and “retarded” for having a more severe form of autism. I mourn as a God mother whose God son came physically disabled for a time when one of his seizure episodes paralyzed one side of his body and had to go through physical therapy to learn how to fully walk again. It greatly disgusts me that some are so lacking in decency that they could see a candidate openly mock a person with a disability and still vote for him.

I mourn because my cousin is half-Hispanic and his father (along with some of his family) came to the US from Mexico. How many Trump supporters would care that my uncle is one of the kindest and sweetest people I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing when their candidate painted Mexicans in a negative light throughout his entire campaign?

But mostly I mourn because I feel having Trump for a president will bring out the hate in the people who put their faith in him. After the election concluded, there was a surge of Trump supporters harassing and attacking minorities, LGBT, and women and felt justified in doing so because that’s what Trump did during his campaign.

I’ve tried to make sense of why people voted for him. Maybe they voted along party lines and this just happened to be the asshole the Republicans put up. Maybe they hated Hillary so much that a racist, homophobic, sexist, draft-dodging, self-absorbed billionaire somehow seemed like the better option to then. Maybe they really did believe he’s going to “Make America Great Again” despite the fact he can’t even keep his own businesses from going bankrupt. Whatever the reasons for putting this orange asshole into office, it’s a slap in the face to me, my friends, and my family.

But this doesn’t mean I accept defeat. I’ll do my best to defy this potential tyrant, even if it only means being outspoken at every injustice this man commits from now on.

Today, I mourn. Tomorrow, I fight.

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